In return for love, will work hard to pick good cabinet, not attack Russia, magically fix economy, etc.

Wednesday, November 5th

9:12PM

Dear Diary,

Am loved:

World loves me for not being Bush.

Majority of United States loves me (though am still unclear on Missouri and North Carolina’s feelings) for not being Bush.

Malia and Sasha love me for promise of new puppy.

Michelle loves me for First Lady status and thus chance to follow in Hillary’s footsteps.

Democrats in Senate and House love me for coattails (really more like cape at this point).

In return for love, will work hard to pick good cabinet, not attack Russia, magically fix economy, etc.

Yours,

President-Elect Barack

Originally posted in The Secret Diary of Barack Obama