The Secret Diary of Barack Obama

Tuesday, October 7th
9:54PM

Dear Diary,

Won debate!  Am winner!  Am popular!  Hope!  Change!

Tried to gloat after debate, but campaign manager David says win mostly due to not making fun of anyone’s hair.  (Michelle was so right about cutting that part out.)  Kept fingers crossed for mid-debate heart attack, but no luck this time.  Voodoo doll not yet working, seems African magic man friend apparently not as good as Dad claimed.  Also, must remember to brush up on CPR so as to appear national hero at next debate should situation arise.

John not very friendly after debate, secretly suspect that may not really be my friend like he said but also possible that his candy-cane tie too tight.  Anyway, made sure to get in good handshake with Cindy afterward.  Such a nice woman.  Michelle refused to speak to her, but should really understand by now that we all can’t be as petite, blonde, attractive, and loaded as Cindy.  Michelle claims that she was just trying to “show solidarity against the opposing party”, but have my doubts.

On bright side, checked polls again—still ahead!

Hopefully yours,

Barack

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